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Our website is to foster kindness–while helping the world.
The world will open more doors when you are kind. Sometimes when you’re not feeling well, you may be more rude. Try to relax, smile, and be kind.
Our website posts many real stories of people from all around the world on how they dealt with bullies. Also, our stories are focused on being kind.
What the Bullies Don’t Know
By Sharon Sulser
I cannot speak for the millions of people that have been bullied or that are being bullied at this very moment, but I can share my story in hopes that some of them read this and find comfort in knowing that they are not alone.
Growing up I had always been bullied by my older brother, he would push me around, call me names, steal my things, and I honestly didn’t think anyone else could hurt me more than he already had. It wasn’t until I entered middle school that I realized there are much crueler kids out there than my brother. The kids from my middle school made me feel like I didn’t want to exist anymore. They would call me “Scar face”, “Plastic surgery”, “Flat chested”, “Ugly”, “Loner”, among many other things. They made fun of anything they could about me, from the sound of my voice, the way I looked, to how I barely had anyone to talk to. All for what? So that they could get a ten second laugh at the expense of my feelings. I tried to make friends, I even joined my school drill team hoping to meet some nice girls, but instead I only met more people to bully me. There was a day we had to take team pictures after school, so I was putting on blush during my last class. One of the girls from my team shouted, “Make up isn’t going to help you look pretty!”, the teacher heard her and rather than defend me all she did was say “Put your make-up away”. I felt so embarrassed and saddened, not only because the teacher completely ignored my teammates obnoxious comment towards me, but because in my mind I felt like she was right, that nothing I did would make me pretty. I would always be the ugly girl who no one wanted to be friends with.
When your classmates and teammates spread their hateful words to you seven hours a day, five days a week, their degrading remarks eventually get you. I thought so low of myself at one point that I didn’t even bother to look in the mirror anymore. I would look at photos of my sister and think “Why couldn’t I have been pretty like her?”. My mother always said to me “Just ignore them, they’re only jealous of you, you’re beautiful”, but I couldn’t see what she saw. I wholeheartedly believed she was either lying to me or needed to see an ophthalmologist, and ignoring the bullies felt impossible. Middle school was by far filled with the most hurtful youth I had ever met and my only real escape was through dance and my love for animals.
Dancing ballet while I was in middle school was one of the biggest gifts my mother could have given to me. The only thing that mattered while I was dancing was my grace and movement, not the sound of my voice nor the number friends I had. My instructor only cared about me pointing my toes and fallowing the rhythm of the music. Other than dancing, I rode horses with “Taking the Reins”, they provide low cost horseback riding lessons to underprivileged girls in Los Angeles, CA. Working with these horses was the most therapeutic experience I could have ever had during the time I was being bullied. The staff and horses gave me a sense of community, and allowed me to see the attributes that really mattered in people; empathy, kindness, and inclusion.
If I could tell my younger self anything it would be this “Speak up for yourself! Do not tolerate or believe a single hurtful word these kids are saying! You are more than your appearance! You may not be able to control your circumstances, but you are in control of your reaction and the effect it has on your mentality! Who are they to tell you what value you have or how you should feel about yourself? The only powerful words that should ever have any influence on how you feel about yourself is your own! Your opinion about yourself is more important than what a million people think of you!”.
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